Kidz Bop 8!
jamie on August 9th, 2005
Another slow week in new releases has left me with nothing else to muse upon but Kidz Bop 8…
I remember when I was young, and mom would take my sister and me to the Meijer store with her (for those of you not acquainted with Meijer stores- they’re like Super Wal-Mart, only they’re been around since, well, since like before I was born, which is long before the first Super Wal-Mart was ever built). In the middle of the Meijer, there was a kids’ center, where parents could drop their kids off to play while they shopped (yes, it was a different time). While we were playing, we had to endure the chime and pan-flute renditions of the day’s pop melodies over the store’s P.A. (which always seemed loudest at the kids’ center). Regardless of the quality of these Muzak renditions, or even whether Zanfir had ever attempted to do “Stairway to Heaven”, the damned songs got stuck in your head. I’m sure Sara and spent many a snowy car trip back from the Meijer store humming, singing, or whistling the Muzak tunes we picked up while mom was getting groceries and recycling aluminum cans (more references to a Michigander’s childhood). Now, before I get into any more parenthetical expositions, let me explain where this is going: as surely as Sam Walton visited a Meijer store and realized what a kick-ass concept it was, the folks that produce the Kidz Bop series realized that those same Muzak renditions that got stuck in their heads as kids could be used to teach kids to love music.
The Idea is simple: take modern pop songs and re-record it using hyper-enunciating vocalists to sing lead, and a choir of “kids” to sing along on the choruses and other key parts (”we gotta drop it like this” on Ciara’s 1, 2 Step for example). This is supposed to encourage kids to sing along, and develop those all-important musical and creative synapses. While I think the idea is sound, I have a quarrel with some of the musical choices- I mean, is there really a need to reinforce Ciara or Gwen Stefani on any kid? I think not.
While the actual entertainment value of the Kidz Bop series is debatable, the entertainment value is clear. Who could resist hits like Green Day’s Boulevard of Broken Dreams or Usher’s Caught Up, sung by kids? Sometimes, it’s as revolting as reality-tv, like the Kidz Bop version of Rich Girl, which in itself was a hip-hop version of the Fiddler on the Roof musical number, making it one more step in a downward spiral towards hell. Or how about the KB rendering of Lonely No More by Rob Thomas- a song so bad to begin with that it was laughable, but with a kids chorus, it’s truly comical. That wonderfully frenetic drum-loop from Amerie’s 1 Thing sounds like a tyco-toy drum set played by Barney himself in the hands of Kidz Bop producers. And the opening “Wooo!” is so full of kid-energy, it could replace that first cup o’ joe in the morning. Actually, the vocalist on that track sounds better than Amerie does on the original- as is often the case on Kidz Bop albums. The studio vocalists they find to reproduce the original songs often only sound marginally like the original artists, but often have singing voices that are far superior. Actually, it sounds like a lot of work has gone into the re-recording of this tracks- not for listening quality or accuracy to the originals, but for the educational purposes. The lyrics are well enunciated, alowing kids to hear and repeat the words more clearly. The melodies in some instances are sung in a more musical style, making it easier for children to find the pitch, and mimic. And when an original song may have been laden with complex rhythms or instruments that might make it hard for find the melody, the Kidz Bop arrangement is simplified (as in the Amerie instance).
While Kidz Bop is entertaining for adults, it only remains as entertaining the first couple of times through. After listening to On The Way Down (Kidz Bop 7) a hundred times in the car, I’m sure the fun of it would certainly wear off for any adult. But point here is the kids, right? Parents are supposed to sacrifice certain things, including their typical music choices while driving, for the sake of their kids. Of course, you could be listening to the TelleTubbies sing-along CD instead of Kidz Bop. I don’t actually have kids, so this is all merely speculative, but if Kidz Bop is still putting together CDs when (if) I do, I’ll be buying every new issue.
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